Wednesday, 6 April 2016

My Non-Negotiables

My Non-Negotiables

The idea for this challenge comes from Katie of Pouting in Heels: For years, I was a ‘one day’ person. You know the ones I mean! One day... But no longer am I that woman. Hell no! A non negotiable list is all about you. What are your ‘musts’? And your ‘must nots’? Think about ’em. Write ’em down. And make them a priority. I was tagged by the lovely Leanne over at A Slice of My Life... Wales.

Without further ado, here is my list -

1. Take Marianna out to do something fun at least once a week.


I try to take Marianna to 'work related' stuff with me as much as I can, to get her out of the house and spend time with her. But... it can be quite stressful trying to keep Marianna quiet and occupied, and concentrate on whatever is happening in the meeting at the same time. I'd like to spend more time at the park, going for walks, and generally doing all that 'mother and baby' jazz.

I'm starting up a new blog series, Out and About in Torfaen, to chart our progress.

2. Sort my hair out.


My hair is looking really dull and drab, so I'm resolving to take better care of it. First step: a good leave-in conditioner!

3. Look after my health.


I've just felt so rotten and run down lately, and want to turn things around. Some of the actions under this heading are really easy to implement - like getting one of those pill boxes with the days on so I can better track which tablets I've taken and when. Others are more involved. I am going to write out and stick to the meal plans, and I am going to keep up with my aerobics. And, most importantly, I am going to be in bed by midnight. I just can't function without a good night's sleep!

4. Paint my nails.


I literally can't remember the last time I painted my nails. So I pledge to myself, here and now, I will take time out to paint them at least once a fortnight.

5. Say 'No'. 


Like lots of people, I really struggle with this. The problem is I end up stretching myself too thin. Sometimes I need to say no - and I really don't need to justify it.



What are your non-negotiables?




106 comments:

  1. It's a great idea to have a list like this!
    I also try to get my daughter out at least once a week to do something fun. We go the library, the park, and sometimes we just go walk around stores. It's always nice to get out.

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    1. It really is - just a little trip can make the day feel so different! x

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  2. Great list, I had something like this at the beginning of the year, I stopped drinking Red Bull, started going back to the gym amongst others and I feel so much better for it! I look forward to seeing how you get on #kcacols

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    1. I used to drink so many energy drinks - I felt so much better when I gave them up! x

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  3. Health is a good one. I've been trying to get more motivated about hitting the gym lately myself #CKACOLS

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    1. It's just getting back into the swing of it - I used to be really good about it!

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  4. Yes, great idea. I am trying to get back into running and my 'non negotiable' is that, when NW is around, I must go for a run in the morning. This sounds better than it really is - I have only managed 2 x 10 min runs so far. But it's a start! #KCACOLS

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    1. It's 20 mins more running than I've done in years!! I've started back on the aerobics and I do feel better for it. x

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  5. My non-negotiables:
    1. Theatre once a month
    2. Wine
    3. Cafe latte
    4. Fresh flowers - a bunch of daffs
    5. Scented candles once Cygnet has gone to bed.
    6. Liz Earle cleanse and polish.

    #KCACOLS

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    1. I love the one about going to the theatre - the last time I went was to see a pantomime about two years ago! x

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  6. I can't even think of any right now! I think it's time for me to sit down and work this out!! ahhahaha! Great post! x #KCACOLS
    kaylaloves.com

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    1. Hehe, that's a sign of contentment! ;)

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  7. Yep, saying NO should be on my list as well. I think I am improving on this one. This is a good idea. Maybe I should start a similar list of my own. #KCACOLS

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    1. Give it a go! I found it quite empowering picking some things I can actually start doing right away, rather than a kind of vague in the future kind of goal. x

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  8. My non-negotiables:
    1. Color my greys once every 5 weeks
    2. matcha ice-cream
    3. cup of tea at 4:oo PM daily
    4. coconut oil hair mask weekly

    #KCACOLS

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    1. I'm really going to have to check out hair masks, they sound fab! x

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  9. I've just managed to paint my nails tonight for the first time in 2 weeks, it felt like a massive achievement! I think I should start my own list once we get used to having baby around! #KCACOLS

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    1. I've managed some clear gloss so far which still made me feel very chic the next day at work! x

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  10. Love this! A fantastic idea. Taking care of yourself is the most important thing and so often we neglect ourselves as mums. Thanks for sharing X #kcacols

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    1. It does kind of slide down the priority list! x

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  11. Love this - I did one of these lists recently and it was so theraputic and reminded me of what I need to be stronger about! Thanks for sharing xx #KCACOLS

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    1. I really enjoyed doing it - it made me focus much better on what I want to change. x

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  12. Great list of no-negotiables hon. I think it's great that you're doing this and I wish you the best of luck with it! Me I don't have a list of no-negotiables but I have started painting my nails recently. Xx #KCACOLS

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    1. Thank you - fingers crossed I'll manage to stick to it! x

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  13. fab list! it helps keep focused having a list I find! #KCACOLS

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    1. I love lists - I don't know what I'd do without them!

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  14. I really need to do this! Also, try a hair mask - they're brill! I use the Label Mummy one from Toni & Guy x #KCACOLS

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    1. Ooh, that sounds awesome, I'm definitely going to check it out! x

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  15. I LOVE to say NO. In fact I think I need to work on saying YES more often! #kcacols

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  16. A really good idea! I would also add to my list; learn to say no as I always find myself doing things I don't want to just because I don't want the awkwardness of refusing! I would also say that I would like to spend more time taking Mia to nicer places than food shopping or to the park! :)

    #KCACOLS

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    1. I'm exactly the same, my attempts to say no just end up sounding like enthusiastic acceptance. :)

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  17. Great post. I have a lot of non negotiable in my life too #kcacols

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  18. Great list Jess and such a good idea. I don't know what all mine are...but this week I put one new one in place...I'm going to take fifteen minutes a day from now on to just sit. No reading, no computer, no television, no radio, no cooking etc. I think 3 five minute bursts to begin with will be doable. Hmm it's got me thinking, thank you for sharing and for cohosting #KCACOLS Lucy at occupation: (m)other

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    1. That sounds really good - just a little bit of time to 'be' without having to focus on something else! x

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  19. What a fab idea - I am going to write my own list of non-negotiables and stick it on the fridge to remind myself - the saying 'No' thing thats right at the top! #KCACOLS

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    1. It's so hard to do, but I know it'll be worth it in the long run! x

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  20. I read Kate's post on this too. Well done you for following it. I need to have much more self discipline as I love the idea but am totally useless at sticking to it! I would love to read - as in a book instead of social media all the time! Love the idea of having a cuppa at a set time. Do you actually manage to drink it;) #KCACOLS

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    1. I always think my mum has the right idea with tea - she prefers it stone cold so it doesn't matter how long something else distracts her from it! x

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  21. Great idea and great list too. Your health should always be a non negotiable. I think one of mine is to have 'me-time' at least once a day, even if it is ten minutes before bed.
    Amanda. #kcacols

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    1. A bit of 'me-time' makes such a difference. Just a few minutes to sit quietly and stare into space can make me feel so much more better equipped to deal with everything else. x

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  22. It's a good idea to have a list like this! Love your list, 'say NO' particularly resonates with me, I've a habit of agreeing to all sorts and stretching myself so thin, and I really need to stop! #KCACOLS

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    1. I know, it just seems so against my nature to say 'no' to anything!

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  23. What a lovely idea... a list of non-negotiables! looking after my health and sorting my hair is on my list I think. When you have kids, we always put ourselves as the least priority which shouldn't be the case. Great post! #KCACOLS

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    1. I was saying exactly this yesterday to Anthony - I can't remember what I even thought or worried about before Marianna came along and took over my entire brain. lol x

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  24. Great ideas! I love your paint my nails non- negotiable. I cannot remember the last time i painted mine either! Although thinking about it now, it's got to be when we got married in 2013! Thats really bad isn't it! xx

    #KCACOLS

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    1. xD My nails used to be my pride and joy, and now I just clip them right down and that's that! x

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  25. I love this. I'm so rubbish at paining my nails so I would definitely need to get Shellac done once a month/6 weeks but don't think hubby would let me as its adds up to be quite expensive. I definitely need to think about what I would have on my list.

    Azaria
    #KCACOLS

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    1. I've always wanted to try having that done - my mum did and her nails looked fab. x

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  26. Love this - I'm a big believer in the importance of looking after yourself as well as everyone else! Hope you feel better after you've ticked everything off the list. #KCACOLS

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    1. Thank you - I've made a start already! :)

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  27. What a great list! I love your saying 'no'. That is something I wish I could do that more! I'm off to start my list!
    Laura xx
    #KCACOLS

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    1. Good luck with the list! I've always been the same, I feel so bad saying no to anything! x

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  28. Great idea for a post and for yourself! My non-negotiables are a hot, bubbly bath once a week in peace and making at least one night a week "screen-free" with the family, which means I have to put down my beloved phone! Eek! #KCACOLS

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    1. Ooh, a screen free night sounds fab - though I'm not sure if I could make it through without cheating! x

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  29. Lovely ideas! I think my current non-negotiable is making time to blog and comment on others' blogs! #KCACOLS

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    1. It's so hard to fit it all in sometimes! x

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  30. It's a good list! Good luck with it. I really need to look after my own health too. Back to school this coming week and I know good intentions will be hard to follow through though #KCACOLS

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    1. Definitely - as soon as I got back to work the eating better one became a 100x harder! lol x

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  31. I hope you find you begin to feel better with this new focus on your non-negotiables. x Alice
    #kcacols

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    1. Thank you - hopefully it will start to make a difference! x

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  32. My mummy would love to get her nails and hair done too! It's such a luxury for her! #KCACOLS

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  33. What a great idea! I can't think of any of my own right now, probably because I am burnt out from doing too much. Think I might make that my first non-negotiable! Good luck with all of yours! #KCACOLS

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    1. Thank you! It took me quite a while to come up with my list - though 'sleep' came straight to mind! ;)

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  34. Brilliant list, I think I could out all of those on my list too. Little things like doing your hair and painting your nails can really make you feel better! Xx #KCACOLS

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    1. I know, it's really surprising how much of a difference they can make. x

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  35. Such a good post. It actually has me thinking I should be doing things better too and creating a list in my head!!
    Lx
    Http://workingmumy.blogspot.com
    #KCACOLS

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    1. Thank you! It was quite fun to do too :)

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  36. Great list and I think number 5 is key to achieving all of the other things on the list. But it is so hard to say no isn't it! I am rubbish at this and then end up taking on to much, then feeling guilty that I am missing out on family time and then run down as I am trying to do much. Argh it is a vicious cycle #KCACOLS

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    1. It really is - I can see people gearing up to ask me, and I'm like, I will say no, I will say no, I will say no... then I open my mouth and out pops 'Of course, I will. It's no problem.' x

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  37. Great list! I think I need to say no more often, like many people I end up offering myself to do lots of things and then kick myself when I get home! Daft!:) I like the painting the nails one and that is something that I will do. First I need to chuck out all gunky old pot and the crackle glaze - why oh why did I buy that!:)

    mainy - myrealfairy

    #KCACOLS

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    1. I went through mine the other day and found the obligatory crackle glaze too! :D I had one of the magnetic ones too but, unlike the lovely picture in the advert, my nails just ended up in a gooey mess! x

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  38. Lovely post, I think I might paint my nails tonight. I can't remember when I last did either!
    #KCACOLS

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    1. I've managed a coat of clear gloss so far - still, it's a start! :)

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  39. Such a great list and one I could've written myself! I definitely need to start taking care of my hair and keeping on top of my nails - I'm not sure when it happened but I have neglected myself a little lately! Good luck x #CACOLS

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    1. Thank you! I hope you can take some time out for yourself too! x

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  40. Great list. I too need to start taking better care of myself. I'm working on going to the gym and eating more veggies, drinking water etc. One of my non-negotiables is sleep... #KCACOLS

    Nicole | The Professional Mom Project

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    1. Oh, sleep... If there's one thing I miss from my pre-parent days, it's sleep!!

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  41. I think this is a WONDERFUL list! I really need to start allowing myself to say no. I spread myself far too thin trying to be wonder woman that I end up exhausted and wondering who's left to care for me. I also need to start giving my nails a little more love <3 #KCACOLS

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    1. Thank you! I just can't help myself - half the time I'm even volunteering for it all! x

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  42. oo i like this idea. Hmmm i need to think of my non negotiables, to paint my nails would be on it and to stick to a Gym routine. #KCACOLS

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    1. I was doing okay on the nails front until I snapped one earlier - still, the fact they were long enough to snap says something! :)

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  43. I love your list Fi. Also, it's not a massive long list. We can all be a bit guilty of just adding to a list until it becomes unachievable. I think yours is spot on and you have some realistic goals there. Equally, it's useful to remember that many of people just allow themselves those things on a regular basis without thinking about it. You can too #KCACOLS

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    1. Aw, thank you! I really tried to keep it quite short because otherwise it would just seem to too daunting! x

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  44. This is such a good idea, so many of us don't take time for us

    #kcacols

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  45. Great list, I like that you're making going out with your daughter a priority. I also struggle with my hair :/ #KCACOLS

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    1. Thank you :) We've been out on a few walks so far and it's been nice just to be out in the fresh air. Though I drew the line on the rainy days - she might have a rain cover for the pram, but I couldn't even find an anorak with a hood! x

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  46. A great list! Mine would be the same apart from saying 'no', I've nailed that. It gets easier as time goes on u think? I hope you enjoy lots more days out now! #kcacols

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    1. I hope so! I've not managed it at all yet! x

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  47. Oh man I definitely need to make a list like this. It would include something about sleep, but it's so hard as a blogger and mommy to get the 8 hours of shut eye we all need! Good luck to you!
    Tori
    www.TheMamaNurse.com

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    1. I never feel like I get enough sleep - I find myself fantasising about early nights! x

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  48. I first discovered the idea of a non-negotiables list over on the lovely Pouting in Heels blog and I think that after having a week of feeling crappy and down in the dumps, it's something I need to sit down and figure out for myself - so, watch this space! I love your list and hope you feel better as a result of sticking to your non-negotiables. I also need to put number 5 on my list - I say yes to too much! x #KCACOLS

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  49. Love your list, we all need to have time for ourselves, no matter how brief! #KCACOLS

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  50. I need to do some of these! Particularly hair and health! Nice to make sure you allocate some fun time to spend with your daughter in amongst the work necessities. Easy to be overtaken by the necessary stuff when fun is important too. #KCACOLS

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    1. Yeah, it just seem to always get left out at the end of the week! x

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  51. A really great list Jess, I am so guilty of a lot of these things too! I like the paint your nails one, there is something about painting my nails that makes me feel like I've got everything together that bit more #KCACOLS xx

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  52. These are brilliant. Your heath is the most important thing, as without it, you can't do any of the other things! (I need to tell myself that too!) And painting your nails is a great one - such a small thing but it makes you feel so much better. And forces you to sit and not do anything whilst they dry, another bonus. Thanks for sharing and cohosting on #KCACOLS sorry I'm so late! xx

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    1. Thank you! (And no worries!!)

      I'm planning to spend half hour on my nails later - they're all different lengths at the moment! x

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  53. Great list! I considered putting about painting my nails on mine but I knew I wouldn't stick to it ha!
    I'm really looking forward to your Out & About In Torfaen series! If you somehow fancy teaming up on it let me know, I would be up for it!

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    1. Awesome! I really need to actually get on and start with it - the only day out we've done so far has been in Newport...

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